What Would Jesus Tweet?!

An interesting question was posed to me yesterday, wondering if I thought Jesus would use social media.

Hmm, good question. He certainly is all over the Internet already.

bradley howell

Though we don't have any evidence that Jesus himself wrote anything down, he consistently referred to and used the stuff of everyday life. Yes, I think its quite possible that Jesus would use social media as a way to connect with those in his relational circle.

So, what would Jesus tweet?

Who knows!

Whatever it is, it would embarrass his family. They would try to get an insanity order to take him off.

Jesus probably would not repost stories that implied if you were a real Christian who was not ashamed of your faith, you would pass this to everyone you know.

Instead he'd probably post: you have heard it said_______, but I say_________.

The religious establishment would likely try to use his own words against him.

After spending time alone in prayer, he would text Peter to send the boat over to pick him up. Then walk out to the middle of the lake just to freak him out.

The look on Peter's face would have made a perfect mobile pic status update! Judas would probably be the first to 'like' it.

He would probably turn his phone off when he was with other people, in prayer, or when it was just time to sleep.

He might enjoy videos of kids doing cute kid things.

I can imagine Jesus tweeting bits of the sermon on the mount. I don't imagine him taking a picture of 5 small loaves of bread and two fish with the post "Dinner for 5000".

Well, maybe if it had a cat in it...

What about you, do you think Jesus would use social media? What do you think Jesus would tweet?

This Year: Resolve to Text Your Teen More

As it stands, the teens in our household do not have texting on their phones. Our high schoolers get it from two angles. As a researcher of adolescent social media use, I don't necessarily want them growing up experiencing the cellphone as an extension of their friendship cluster. As an accountant, my wife sees no financial reason to do it.

brad howell

Poor kids - if they ever want to do anything, they pretty much have to pay for it themselves.

However - within boundaries - I do not believe teen texting is bad!

I actually think its a positive trend and a great way for teens to interact with each other when they are not physically present.

It certainly is less disruptive to the family than the days when teens would tie up a land line for hours on end.

Teens need the support that their friendships provide. Texting can be a healthy supplement to that. It works for parents too!

Almost every parent who texts their teens feels closer to them. The majority of teens who text with their parents in turn also feel closer to them.

Teens and parents feeling closer to each other? Sounds like a positive outcome for a counter-intuitive New Year's Resolution...

When To Make Sure You Say 'Goodbye' Online

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Among social media users, younger teens are the most likely to filter online interactions only from their own perspective of reality. They have little capacity to view life from another's shoes without being prompted to do so. Additionally, they use their new found Internet independence to gather positive interactions with people they know online - they are very in tune with whether interactions would suggest you like them or not. Consequently, more than anyone else in your SM network, younger teens are the most likely to get a sense that they have been ignored online. This seems to be especially true of younger females, but there are plenty examples of young men that are quick to send an IM the moment they see a green icon light up online and looking for affirmation from you.

Teens reaching out to you online is a great thing - it reveals that they value your relationship. Using social media to reinforce relationships with younger teens in your life is good for them - it helps build 'social capital' - an important ingredient on the journey to adulthood. The reason they view the interaction pretty much only from their definition of reality is because they are concrete thinkers. It goes with the territory. So, when the conversation needs to be wrapped up (and it would practically never end without a pop up video of a dancing kitten), it is an important practice to concretely end the conversation with a solid 'good-bye'.

And, for good measure, why not throw in an emoticon? Everyone loves to stick out their tongue when they get the chance...no?!

  

Want to Feel Closer To Your Teen? Text Them

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One supporting area teens need to successfully transition from childhood to adulthood is a sense of closeness to emotionally encouraging adults - like parents for example. Feelings of closeness is about the strengths of bonds between parents and kids. Like all needs, closeness is rated from the perspective of the child, not the parent. To that end, research indicates that almost 2/3 of teens feel closer to their parents when they exchange text messages with them. That in itself is a pretty good reason to start adding text messages to your relational connection repertoire. For parents however, the number who feel closer to their teens when texting them jumps to 90%. That means almost every parent can feel closer to their teen by exchanging texts. Though no technological tool can replace a quality offline relationship, positive affirmation is always a good thing, and good things tend to replicate themselves.

So send a text to your kids today...just wait until they get out of school to do it - their teachers will thank you.

R U An Inadvertent Cyber Bully?

Have you ever left an app with instant message abilities open on a different tab or even different window? Then you might have been a cyber bully perpetrator and didn't even know it!

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This is common practice for many of us to have multiple tabs open online at the same time. Some of those tabs are open to social media sites like Facebook that have IM features to it. No big deal?

Well, probably not, unless you have any early adolescents as part of your IM contacts.

Cyber bullying is most prevalent among younger teens. More than half of teens who have experienced cyber bullying in the past several months are most likely to report that the form of bullying was by being ignored online.

That's right...being ignored.

This can happen intentionally, but it can also happen accidentally. Early adolescents tend to be concrete thinkers, they take the world at face value - everything is what it appears to be. Mr. Bean is a caricature of this. If they want to IM with you and your online icon is lit up, then subconsciously to an early adolescent you are available.

But if you are not? The lack of response is unnerving to a young person.

However, there is hope!

If you have a habit have using multiple tabs, make sure your message alerts are activated. If you are going to be away from your computer for a while, take the time to log off any IM enabled sites. Finally, teach younger teens and pre-teens to understand that a lit icon does not necessarily mean another person is there. They can understand this, they just need prompting. Also, teach them to be aware of how their icons may appear to their friends. This learned behavior can vastly reduce the number of perceived cyber bullying incidences.

How have you seen misunderstandings happen online because people were not physically sharing the same space?

Using Social Media To Connect Extended Family

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Social media is a great tool to connect extended family with each other, especially considering the distances that often separate grandparents from grandchildren and cousins from each other and their aunts and uncles. The good news is that many teens think social media helps them stay in contact with extended family too. 


For extended families that travel together, one idea is to setup a family event page. Because the anticipation of the trip can be as much fun as the trip itself, a page like this will gain momentum quickly. Encourage those going on the trip to offer lodging, meal and activity ideas. Large groups tend to go back to the same place as they have been previously, so post some old pictures of past trips and links to new experiences. Tap into the cleverness of that crazy uncle who knows all the weird trivia to create games or contests, and then award winners at family gatherings. Use it during the trip as a place to post gathering times, locations and contact information, and encourage teens especially to post videos and pictures capturing family memories. 


Every family has their story, creating a place to gather memories and anticipate new ones will build connections both across and between generations.


How is your family using social media to keep connected with those you don't see regularly?

New California Law Includes Cyber Bully Preparedness with Earthquake Preparedness Plans

Two new cyber bullying laws go into effect this July in California, designed to curtail bullying behavior by expanding the definition to include cyber activities and mandate educator cyber bullying safety preparedness plan.

Highlights of the two new laws:

-they require educators to act and get involved, when safe to do so
-they require a plan of action, with a reasonable timeline
-there is opportunity for appeal
-victims will get priority in changing schools if need be
-training for educators, students and parents in identifying cyber bullying

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-they equate emotional care of all students with physical care, such as earthquake safety preparedness
-perpetrators can be removed from school if the targeted student: feels they are personally threatened, there is an effect on their emotional/mental health, or if it interferes with their academics.

It is good that politicians treat this issue very seriously, they want to reduce bullying, and statistically there has been little change in the past few years that would suggest anyone is making an real headway. The solution here is to broaden the term, require educator intercession and expand awareness programs. The problem is that the California Legislature continues to do what they are good at: looking like they are acting when really they are just making it someone else's problem.

Among those who serve youth there is a real desire to help, and many are actively looking for solutions - they do not need to be legally required to do so. Most schools are doing online monitoring fairly well. Computers are set in public spaces, awareness programs are often in place and teachers are fairly aware of changes in a student's behavior that may indicate pain. However, students are very adept at using technology to their own ends, and are not afraid to do so. Consequently, which type of social media is used, and how it is implemented is more driven by the social group. Ultimately though, cyber bullying requires Internet or texting access. Much of the cyber bullying that occurs on school property is done through the use of text and data plan cell phones, decidedly not provided by the schools.  In the end parents equip students with the tools needed to participate in cyber bullying on school property, leaving educators with little resource to either turn the tide of cyber bullying or meet the legislative expectations laid upon them.

Does Facebook Trash Talk Mean The End Of Social Media?

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Just before Facebook's IPO, GM announces they are taking their ball and going home, the game doesn't work and they are not going to play anymore. The next week the wealthiest investors, who don't seem to have any idea of what social media is all about, invest in the most anticipated IPO in recent history on a stock market that ironically has technical difficulties. Instead of doubling their money by day's end, they walk away with less cash...way less. By the next week, everybody is an expert and suggests they predicted the demise of Facebook. Really?! Now, as Facebook's stock continues its downward spiral it seems in vogue to declare that people are abandoning Facebook and that the brief era of social media is going the way of chat rooms and dodo birds.

Problem is, I don't think so. At least not for social media.

People intuitively desire to tell others what they are experiencing, and Facebook has been a great platform for doing that. I concede that Facebook traffic is down, but there is not another common platform just yet that the masses are willing to embrace. People migrated en masse from MySpace to Facebook in large part because Facebook was easier to use, and perhaps more socially acceptable for people who were not 16 year old girls. But it does not mean people have stopped using social media tools to get their experiences out.

Case in point, the other night we went as a family along with my wife's office coworkers and their families to see the Sacramento showing of Wicked. If you have not seen Wicked yet, GO...but I digress.  Perhaps because this group is mostly lawyers, accountants and financial planners, society has us on the balcony. Whatever the reason, it is a great place to observe people during the intermission, and observing others is something I love to do. As the break happens, the lights come on and all across the auditorium people are either making a bee-line for the restrooms, checking their cell phones, or in some cases, doing both! It was pretty impressive to see all of those little blue square screens light up across the crowd. People were tweeting, texting and checking messages. Some may have even been posting on Facebook, but I am not sure...no time to ask. The point is, they were all actively engaging in what is otherwise known as social media.

Whether or not it is appropriate to do this while your friends stand around you with their hands in their pockets will be the subject of another post.

Using technology to share experiences with others who are not physically present is social media. Chat rooms went the way of the dodo bird in part because they were too time bound to be a useful tool, and in part because there were too many people you didn't know inserting themselves into personal conversations. This was not good. However, as long as the population is highly mobile, people will embrace the technology that keeps them connected with the folks they care about the most. That is something I do not see changing any time soon.

Don't Step In the Cow Poo!

My parent's were in town this weekend and re-shared a story of a time when my son was about 3 years old and staying with my parents on their cattle ranch. Walking across the cow pasture, Grandma helped avoid the numerous cow pies with a simple warning to watch out for the cow poo. As they zig-zagged across the field, they came to the winter feeding area, one end of which had a rather large mound of cow manure that the tractors had pushed out of the feeding area to clear the ground. What was a fairly disgusting hill to most adults became a Mt. Everest that needed to be conquered in a child's mind. With surprising speed and determination, grandson tore off to climb manure mountain, leaving grandma in the dust with little to stop the horrifying collision of child and poo but a shouting appeal to STOP, DON'T CLIMB THAT HILL!

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Whether it was the shrill in grandma's voice, fear of the unknown or the action of an obedient child, forturnately for grandma, her grandson stopped short of becoming a brown ball of muck. Of course, bewildered, he turned to grandma to ask why not, to which the instructive reply came that the hill was in fact a really large pile of cow poo. Confused, my son turned back to the hill of manure, studying it for a moment before asking a simple question of childhood wonder:

"Was that a big cow?"

Experience is a great thing. From experience we gain wisdom, we develop an ability for insight, and we use it to frame an intuitive understanding of what we are experiencing in this world. In fact, everything we experience for the first time is filtered through a mental filter of past experiences that help us form an understanding, or perspective really, of our new reality. This tool of interpretation happens instinctively, we are not overtly aware that we utilize it. Consequently, it is easy to expect others to have the same intuitive sense that we have. It is easy to get frustrated with people who don't seem to get it.

Social media as an expression of human community is fraught with intuitive misunderstandings. The reality is that early and middle age teens do not necessarily have the life experience (and at times the cognitive ability) to interpret the social messages they are experiencing or understand the rippling social consequences of their own postings. Even though it may feel that teens want their space, it is important for adults to be very aware of their kid's social footprint, being available to guide young people away from the piles of poo that are often present on social media postings.

The best way to accomplish this is to walk these social fields together, being ever available both online and off to provide an additional perspective of the manure mountains.

Blessings on the journey!

Brad

Why You Don't Want A "Social Media Voice" In Youth Ministry

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Looking through an upcoming conference website I noticed a break out session focusing on social media. Of course, this gets my interest as I pretty much always take the time to read such descriptions. Most of these make me angry and this one was no exception.

The thrust of the breakout is that social media exists because the cry of the human heart is for community and this cry fuels further social technological advances. The description sets up a sort of snapshot take of social media, a mere and incomplete reflection of real relationships. The story is the same as many of these types of sessions: we as a society do not get the community that we crave and so we have set up these complicated computer mediated networks that simultaneously attempt to connect us yet safely keep us at arms length with each other. The answer is to simplify our lives, yet not abandon social media completely because there is a need for a Christian voice in this medium.

Let us not abandon these poor digital souls who do not know any better but to engage in empty relationships. Let us take pity on them and tell them instead there is a better way. Let us be a voice to the lost, let us draw them to our blogs so that we can be encouraged by our stats and the multitudes will know the truth and be informed that what they really want is a non-virtual relationship.

Yes...that paragraph is dripping with sarcasm.

The problem is that we are so conditioned by entertainment we use this as a background to interpret what is happening on social networks. By doing so, we limit the impact of social media to how many followers we have, and measure significance by audience. Consequently we completely miss the ministry point, and conference organizers continue to throw away precious Kingdom resources because we do not understand why our young people's smart phones are an extension of their arms.

Social media does not exist because people deeply desire community, social media exists as an expression of community. It is a place where people tell those they have a relationship with what is going on in their lives.

The primary motivation to joining a specific social networking site is friends. The biggest technological change efforts in the social media landscape is not how to build the largest audience, but how to segment your friends into relational circles, so that you can interact with only the group you intend to. Bringing a voice to this is like yelling in a digital wilderness. Additionally, teens are bombarded with so much data they cannot possibly take it all in. We do not win by merely contributing a voice to that onslaught of data. We win by being a part of a teen's offline network so that our online interactions are an extension and reflection of our existing offline relationship.

We win by listening to what people have to say.

Which leads me to wonder, how do you decide which voices to help navigate the social media wilderness do you listen to and why? How do you evaluate them?

Cyber Bullies Fueled By Sarcastic Abilities

Cyber bullying is a popular topic among adults who work with teens, and rightly so, nobody wants to see kids emotionally destroying one another. Its sad, it tugs at our heart and it motivates adults to step in before someone gets hurt. Cyber bullying is a complex issue with multiple levels of motivation mixed in with developmental limitations and inadvertent offenses. One very intentional ingredient though is sarcasm.

As early adolescents begin to think abstractly, the realization sets in that they have an ability to say one thing that implies something completely different. How cool is that! Its like discovering magic, and of course, practice makes perfect...

Give a kid a hammer and everything begins to look like a nail.

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Why sarcasm works is because it is a two sided coin. It tears someone else down while it appears to build someone else up. The majority of intentional cyber bullying activity occurs with a group of friends in front of a computer screen. Everyone wants to matter, but young teen girls constantly have their 'do you like me' radar on and this group of friends provide an unwitting audience to their cyber genius. Where off line bullying may end sooner because somebody sees the pain of the victim and eventually has the courage to step in, among more concrete thinking early adolescents, empathy for the victim will not come without intentional prodding. Someone who can think abstractly needs to connect the dots for a younger person who thinks more in the here and now.

Young teens do not intuitively have empathy for a person across a social network.

Educating young people can help, but it will not typically serve as an inhibitor for those who will choose to use sarcasm to cyber bully. Instead, we need to educate adults, equipping households with mental models that allows for adult awareness of and guiding participation with, adolescent Internet activity. Only adults living life online with their teens will help curb such a destructive behavior among early adolescents.

Questions: How have you seen or experienced the use of sarcasm to bully?

What are some ways that adults can be more aware of what teens are doing online?

Facebook Not Making The Wealthy Wealthier

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As the third day of trading gets underway, Facebook continues to not make the wealthy wealthier. By the end of trading the first day, fingers were being pointed. Close out the second and people are estimating where the bottom will be. Mark Z has said the business is driven by a social agenda and not investor's wealth. So far he is proving his point.

Other than the obvious over-valuation of the IPO, there is a fundamental difference in how Facebook operates compared to other Internet giants like Google. Companies want to be able to advertise in a way that makes sense to them, project a product in a manner that causes people to spend their money on it. Google can do that by target advertisements linked to search engine queries. As GM pointed out last week, Facebook was not effective in doing that, consequently they were pulling the plug on site advertising. From a return on investment evaluation, it was not working.

The adult majority population continues to see the Internet as a tool best utilized for disseminating information. Social networking sites however are not built on that, they are built on relationships. It is not the information a company wants me to know that matters, it is what my circle of 'friends' are experiencing that matters.

Facebook is a giant human web of relationships about 1 billion strong. Advertisers want to envision that as a giant crowd of people all staring at a screen as if they were waiting to buy something. TV did that - everyone watching experienced the same thing at the same time. A digital web of relationships does not operate simultaneously, it operates in waves. What is important is decided by the community, by the network, by the relationships.

Someday, somebody, somewhere will figure out how to make a boatload of money riding the waves of human relationships. Oh wait, somebody did...we call if Facebook.

Let me know, did you the think Facebook IPO would soar or tank? Gut feeling or valuation?